Take Them Along

Years ago, someone noticed a young mother with her small children at church conferences. Back then, there were just two young ones. They held tightly to their mother’s hands and followed her everywhere. Some older women took in the scene and with a wistful smile said, “While they are little, they let themselves be led to the church services. But one day, they will go their own way.”

These words impacted the young woman deeply. Her heartfelt desire was to raise her children for God, not for the world. In her distress, she sought advice from a pastor. He listened to her and said calmly, “Don’t be afraid. The most important thing is that you are on fire for Christ and live for Him. Then the Holy Spirit will work on your children’s hearts and lead them to God.”

Years passed by. Trials and tough times were inevitable. But the children grew up and came to faith in their youth.

Parents as God’s co-workers

It is by God’s grace that we know the Savior and are able follow Him. It is also His grace alone that draws and saves our children (read John 6:44; Ephesians 2:8-9). As parents, we cooperate in this vital process—we are to take our children “along” in following Jesus. Just as Moses declared to Pharaoh before the exodus from Egypt in Exodus 10:9: “We will go with our young and our old, with our sons and our daughters, with our flocks and herds, for we must hold a feast to the Lord.”

Pharaoh strongly opposed the people of Israel taking their children with them (Exodus 10:8-11). Even today, Christian parents often face intense spiritual battles. But thanks be to God—we fight on the winning side, not on the field of defeat! God’s Word contains many promises to believers regarding their families, for example.

Psalm 103:17-18: “But the mercy of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear Him, and His righteousness to children’s children, to such as keep His covenant, and to those who remember His commandments to do them.”

Deuteronomy 30:19-20: “Choose life, so that you and your descendants may live, by loving the Lord your God, obeying His voice, and holding fast to Him.”

Acts 11:14: “He will bring you a message through which you and all your household will be saved. (the angel to Cornelius).

Acts 16:31: “Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved—you and your household” (Paul and Silas to the jailer in Philippi).

Other examples include Lydia, the seller of purple, and her household (Acts 16:15), Crispus, the synagogue ruler in Corinth, and his household (Acts 18:8), and more.

How can we guide our children into a relationship with God, into serving Him? Let us consider this question in view of Romans 12:2: “Do not be conformed to this world.”

Be an example

Don’t the words “come with me” sound very different from “go there”? Taking someone with you means doing something yourself while allowing others to participate. Be an example to your children “in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, and in purity” (1 Timothy 4:12).

Children clearly sense what truly matters to their parents—whether it’s material possessions, personal recognition and self-fulfillment, or eternal values, love for God and for others. They notice whether we resist God’s ways and working, or humbly ask for His grace to walk the path of selflessness. They notice whether God’s Word remains mere head knowledge or shapes our hearts and lives.

Draw your children into your prayer and faith life. Instead of speaking negatively about difficult people at the dinner table, forgive those who have hurt you and pray for them (Luke 6:28). By God’s grace, turn stressful situations into prayer requests and tell your children about the miracles He works in your life. This way, they’ll learn to trust you with their concerns and ask you for advice and prayer.

Take your children to experience the blessings of spiritual fellowship, such as attending Bible study and prayer meetings during the week. They will only learn to value these times if they see it’s a genuine priority for you.

Have them join you in faithful service. Whether it’s in the household, visiting the sick, helping with repairs for fellow believers, or “hands on” service in church—this becomes a lesson. They can learn what it means to be faithful in small things for Jesus and to show compassion to others.

Take them along when you honor and care for your elderly parents. Although generational differences can be challenging, children must learn that God’s command in Exodus 20:12 remains timeless: “Honor your father and your mother.”

Encourage your children in every good way—but don’t let them become passive spectators and consumers. Involve them in responsibilities by assigning specific tasks. As they grow, so should their responsibilities, allowing their character and skills to develop, making them capable and dependable people.

Be honest

Being a role model doesn’t mean being perfect. It’s not about us, but about Jesus Christ – He should be glorified! That includes admitting our wrongs and asking for forgiveness—even from our children.

The mother referred to in this article continues:

“I remember a time when I was working too much. Whatever the work—if it leaves us no time for fellowship with God and the people He entrusted to us, then something needs to change. At that time, we also noticed our teenage daughters were influenced by friends. I could feel the established trust slipping away, and our relationship suffered. It felt like a wall of misunderstanding and resistance.

When I earnestly asked God for wisdom and guidance, He showed me that I needed to ask our children for forgiveness—for my impatience, stress, and the lack of time. The conversation lasted over two hours; we cried together and came to renewed understanding. The wall between us disappeared, and harmony was restored. To this day, I am infinitely grateful to God.”

Whoever wants to be a role model and is honest about it will often experience inadequacy. Even the best we can offer our children is not perfect. In hindsight, we might wish we had done some things differently—despite our best intentions at the time. Let’s not be discouraged, but humbly look to God. Let’s trust Him with our imperfect efforts and ask Him to use them for His glory and to guide our children.

Let go

This is perhaps the most difficult thing for a loving parent’s heart: How can you let go of a child who is, after all, a part of yourself? However, this is not about indifference. Our children are entrusted to us for only a short time—they belong to God, and we must intentionally place them back into His hands.

Think of Abraham in Genesis 22:1-19.

Or of Zechariah and Elizabeth in Matthew 3:1-4. What must they have felt when their only son withdrew into the wilderness and lived on locusts and wild honey? They knew that God had a plan and trusted Him.

When you let go, God can continue His work—in you and in your children. This assurance brings comfort and strength in every situation in life.

It helps you look upon the past, present, and future with gratitude and confidence.

Helene Rotfuss

Pforzheim, Germany