Scripture tells us that God designed marriage in the Garden of Eden after He created the first woman for the first man. The design of marriage is by no means outdated; Jesus and Paul both referred to Genesis to answer difficult questions about love, commitment, and divorce (Matthew 19:4-5; Ephesians 5:31). In Genesis 1:26-28, we read how God created man (Adam) on the sixth day of creation. Though God was pleased with how He created Adam, He was not pleased with the fact that Adam was alone, and so He intervened (Genesis 2:18). Scripture says in Genesis 2:21-23: “And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. And Adam said: ‘This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.’” Furthermore, Genesis 2:24-25 says: “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.” Within this creation story of Adam and Eve, we find a number of God-designed purposes for marriage.
1) Separation from parents — “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother” (v. 24a): Marriage is designed to separate children from their parents (which is not a negative thing). When you’re a minor living at home, you’re dependent on your parents. They are your caregivers and guardians, but through marriage, this changes. With marriage, both parents and children need to cut these ties so that the husband and wife can provide for each other’s needs. This doesn’t mean that a married couple can’t seek the help or advice of others, but in such situations the couple should first discuss and determine together how best to seek help.
2) Lasting covenant — “be joined to his wife” (v. 24b): Marriage is designed to be a lasting covenant. Marriage is a covenant, not a contract. A contract is when one person agrees to do something as long as the other person does his or her part. The moment that the other person no longer carries through, a contract is no longer binding. A covenant, however, is a lasting promise. A marriage covenant is a promise before God that no matter what comes their way, a married couple will be faithful to one another, care for one another, protect each other, and love each other.
3) Unity — “and they shall become one flesh” (v. 24c): Marriage is designed to create unity between husband and wife. Jesus says in Matthew 19:6, “So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let not man separate.” Though a marriage covenant unites a man and woman before God, the couple does not leave the wedding ceremony perfectly unified in every manner of thinking or moral conviction. People are different and should be afforded the right to think for themselves. That said, after years of caring for one another and living together, married couples will often notice how similar they become. They learn to share each other’s values and even think in similar ways. This is why it is vital that Christians find marriage partners who serve Jesus. Paul warns us, “Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever?” (2 Corinthians 6:14-15). We need to be very careful and discerning about who we choose as a marriage partner. However, when we find someone who loves and serves Jesus, and someone we love and who loves us back, uniting in marriage is a wonderful thing.
4) Intimacy — “And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed” (v. 25): Marriage is designed to provide for the intimate, emotional, and physical needs of adults. Intimacy isn’t just physical; it is the assurance that we can be completely transparent with another individual without feeling afraid, embarrassed, or self-conscious. Adam and Eve were not ashamed to be together. To have this kind of intimacy in a marriage, there needs to be trust. If you can’t fully trust the person that you’re together with before you’re married, then this level of intimacy will be lacking once married.
5) To bear offspring— “Be fruitful and multiply” (Genesis 1:28b): Marriage is designed to bear offspring and create stable and healthy environments for children to be raised.
“Then God saw everything that He had made, and indeed it was very good” (Genesis 1:31a). God’s design of marriage is very good. He was pleased at what He had created and enjoyed His communion with Adam and Eve. Married couples can still experience a part of Eden today when they follow God’s design for marriage and serve Him together.
To be continued
David Knelsen
Hamilton, ON
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